News Thread

My big mate Paul finally got a girl he'd been after for weeks into the sack at the weekend. Ater doin the nasty, he removed the gongy and tried to nonchalantly spin it round his finger ....only to look on in horror as it slipped from his grasp and hit the lass right in the mush ...

LOL goose! what did she do?

i don't know actually sk! she looked proper traumatised when she was telling me all of this though. i dont think she had sex again for like, two years.

Dunno Duck ....the big man didn't hang around long enough to wait for a response....

LOL. Why do people tell other people about stupidity involving sex. It's like I still can't believe me mate Paul's friend from uni who actually told people about when and how he broke his cock.

I'm not surprised she was traumatised! And you did the supportive friend act by lol'ing in her face.

it was FUNNY!

to be fair i tell all my friend everything stupid thats ever happened to me in sex. and they tell me. i think its just cos everything is even funnier when you're naked.

Tell us EVERYTHING...after all, we're your friends.

To be fair, the big man has a bit of history with sex related blunders. He once fell asleep in the cinema when a girl was giving him a chug.

As long as he kept it up and didn't make a fucking mess of his keks, he's probably done alright on that one.

He also pulled a stunningly attractive barmaid one night in Glasgow ....took her back to his flat, smoked some weed then suddenly realised he really needed a shit ....He woke up the next morning flat out on his bathroom floor ..naked, apart from a hand towel placed over his nether regions on which, written in lipstick, was the legend ..."NO USE""

i spose i could tell you the story behind the kraken as you know about the kraken anyway, but boys tend to find that less funny.

Niiiicely done, there. What a legend. Again - why not just tell everyone she was as good as she looked, with everyone else none the wiser!

Yessss, do tell the story behind the Kraken! The name alone suggests it's a good 'un.

if they're not mad, don't trust them.

JESUS FREAKIN CHRIST look at the slow-mo at 56 secs.

Google Wave sounds cool.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/oxfordshire/8080315.stm

what worries me about this is they're claiming the damage is £600K. what the hell was he growing there?

bantha_fodder+ wrote:

bill killed

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/8082995.stm

And people wonder why we voted this man Mayor of our capital! Brilliant. We may have found the one man who'll upstage Bush for worth being in office purely for comedy value.

It will get him publicity. It must be newsworthy.

UFO disclosure ...

http://www.allnewsweb.com/page6916918.php

Warning: Could be a fake site.

That Boris video looks fake, as the camera was looking at his legs before he fell over...