100 Uses for a Sausage Other Than Eating It

24. Hollow it out and use it as a tiny bag.
Is that one already?

23. Try to breed it with a carrot to create a sausage that can make you see in the dark.

22. An almanac.

....that doesn't work at all.

You think the rest of these do? Twit

21. Staple it to your cheek and pretend it's a scar

Eve wrote:

You think the rest of these do? Twit

Yours is OTT...you could barely fit a cracker joke on a sausage.

Incidently.

20. A new kind of meat based christmas cracker.

I'm talking about a massive sausage here, and the writing doesn't have to be large.

No eve...you can't just invent a massive sausage for your needs.

Thats not how it works.

You stupid fuck.

19. A toilet roll.

It's how hers work.

18. Air freshener (leave one lying around in a room a few weeks; you'll see)

No YOU stupid fuck.

17. A makeshift shiv to stab in eves face.

Oh, how clever of you.

Home stretch now, less stabbing, more inventing.

16. Spare chess piece

I want to make babies in you, Eve you gorgeous creature.

I'd rather fuck an axe.

...and probably have.

15. Marry it

14. A substitute for a velvet glove to slap a thespian with.

Sure, Jason, sure.

13. Make it alive

who is a femenime thespian

Eve, lets run off to disney land together and live under the runaway minetrain forever and ever.

Hmmm, let's see...No.

Not a fan of the minetrain er?